Ups and Downs

I wrote this yesterday and I don't feel like going through everything and changing it to past tense: 

Today in class we had a substitute teacher. Her name was Cecile and she was a sixty year old, extremely petite, crazyface. She spoke barely any English and was still able to teach us. That still fascinates me. She acted everything out very elaborately and was overall hilarious. Class was actually extremely easy for me today almost to the point of boredom, and I think things are really starting to click. I'm able to say some things without thinking, and my favorite word has somehow become ouais, pronounced 'way' and meaning 'yeah'. After class and lunch, we went downtown to go to H&M, and a lady walked up to us advertising something forFête des Mères (Mother's Day, which is on Sunday here), and after she stopped talking extremely fast, I automatically said, "Non, merci" to which she answered "D'accord,"meaning 'okay'. It was definitely something small, but I think it was the first time I've spoken to a French person with confidence. My friend complimented me for thinking on my feet, and it surprised me. It's so funny when you don't even realize you cross a threshold of progress. I have definitely hit the phase where I am comfortable enough with my routine and with my surroundings to absolutely fall in love with France. 

Today couldn't be more opposite. After a weird and awkward misunderstanding with my host mom last night(over texting, no less), the tension was heightened even more when I made her late for work because I missed the bus. The bus was early for the first time ever, and I was like 20 feet away from the stop when I saw it fly past me. I honestly don't think I hate anything more than making stupid mistakes that affect other people and that are unfixable. There was nothing that could be done, and I felt horrible for the duration of class, in which I performed terribly. I just beat myself up so much when I can't do certain things or I make really stupid mistakes. I came home and took a nap, hoping to get somewhat of a restart. I planned to go to the bank to exchange my traveler's checks because I am out of cash, but when I was practicing what I needed to say, I realized I didn't have time to walk there before it closed at 5. And it's not open until Monday. Therefore, I am cashless for the weekend, which really, really sucks. Lessons learned today: always be at least 5 minutes early for the bus and the banks close at 5 and are not open all weekend. I think I'll go take a walk to shake off this frustration. I have to remind myself that God's doing something when everything goes wrong. Tomorrow we are going to Bayonne, so it should be a good time. Here are some pictures from my recent walks.